2006---2007!!!!

"I know men; and I tell you that Jesus Christ is no mere man; between Him and every other person in the world there is no possible term of comparison. Alexander, Caesar, Charlemagne, and I have founded empires. But on what did we rest the creations of our genius ? Upon force! Jesus Christ founded His empire upon Love; and at this hour millions of men would die for Him."

- Napoleon Bonaparte

Attempting to be the Classics/ History buff I aspire to be (minus the bow-ties, the tweed suits, and the British accent haha), this quote really spoke out to me a couple of days back when I was reading Donald Miller's "Searching For God Knows What". It's so interesting to have Napoleon, a militaristic conqueror and leader, acknowledge the CORE meaning and ministry of Jesus. It's even more funny that he realizes loyalty and success could be derived from two completely separate types and styles of leadership; one derived from his own model of war and subjugation, the other being from Jesus' peace and unconditional love for others. In looking further, the models of Alexander, Caesar, Charlemagne and even Napoleon's empires only brought temporary stability and success. None of their empires or power stood the test of time because in bringing forceful obligations, rebellion always ensued. On the contrary, Jesus' model and his means to express love in actions and behaviours was what set his "empire" apart from the others. His love meant being vulnerable. His love meant being understanding and non-judgmental.

This past year has been full of new lessons, challenges and surprises. There were times, when I just had no capacity to do what Jesus would have done. Yet, God has been so faithful, patient, and merciful to me. He put me in situations, surroundings and relationships that required me to be vulnerable, honest, patient, understanding, and the hardest one for me, non-judgmental. This Christmas, I was reminded of just how He has blessed me immeasurably in many aspects of my life...

It's been a tough year of changes within my family. As my parents are getting through that middle-age period, my grandparents are getting older and more forgetful, and I'm getting older and wanting more independance, there have been many lessons on patience and understanding. What I've learnt to appreciate the most from my family this year was their willingness to pray WITH each other and FOR each other. I'm so thankful to know that I can pray with my family for something as simple as dinner, and to know that they are praying for me as well :)

Whether new or old, God has blessed me this year with great friendships that have extended far beyond surface conversations. One thing I learnt from Urbana that really encouraged me was to be involved in and with a community of people. Despite all our different backgrounds (religious, family, cultural), the relationships developed during this past year have taught me how to enjoy people placed in my life, and to learn the meaning of carrying each other's joys and burdens. Finally, the biggest surprise of all this year was God's providence in the "romantical" department hahah.... I say surprised because I was caught off guard when it all started. Surprised because I had come to accept and be okay with my singleness for the time being. Surprised because Mr. Isaac Ling is so "white" and I am the epitomy of "chineseness"...haha. Surprised because I go to Queen's, the best school on the planet, and he has to be from Western (hhaha, I can already feel the influx of pro-Western comments flooding my comments). Yet, God has taught me many things through Ike and in our times together thus far. Somehow, I have learnt that vulnerability and honesty with a person (especially a guy) is okay... I don't always have to pretend that I'm tough or put up a wall or mask... someone that cares will want to hear about my thoughts and my opinions (even if it may differ from theirs). Another thing I have learnt through Ike is in giving others the benefit of the doubt, not judging them for their experiences in the past... that's an aspect of Jesus' unconditional love for others that I have yet to fully understand and exercise. God is definitely full of surprises, eh ? He's not one that follows a rule book or guideline in writing our journeys and stories with Him.

All in all, a very interesting year! It never ceases to amaze me how relational God is. He continually reminds me that all good and perfect things come from Him. So... I wonder what things will happen this coming year as I enter my last semester of undergrad at uni, as he opens and closes doors to what I will do in my future, as he brings new or old people back into my life.........What's to come ? Whatever it is, I'll strive to be ready for it face-on... Bring it On, New Year!!

PLATFORM 6

"Platform 6" tells the story of a person's life, from cradle to grave, happening
on a railway terminus platform. Why a platform? Platforms are where people go to
board trains. They are places we pass through on our way to somewhere else. The
question this story raises is, "Where are we going in this life? What is really
important in the end? Shouldn't our main goal be to be ready for what comes
after this life?"

God is so Good!

In celebration of finishing some of my apps, I'm finally updating after a month's hiatus :) In the past month, God's been so good to me. He's continually showing me his Blessings and his grace in many aspects of my life. His fulfillment of promises and answers to many "age-old" questions I have had have recently seemed to be manifested through different people and situations. Whether it is in new relational developments with a certain "COOL" "friend" hahah :) or in granting me grace in schoolwork and marks, it is true how He does not withhold anything good from us. I remember reflecting on a passage a couple of weeks back during my times with the Lord. The Israelites were filled with joy and happiness in how the Lord had delivered and done great things for them. . .

Psalm 126: "When the Lord brought back the captives of Zion,
we were like men who dreamed.
Our mouths were filled with laughter,
our tongues with songs of joy.
Then it was said among the nations
The Lord has done Great Things for us."

I feel the same way as those Israelites right now. I KNOW that God has brought me OUT of the desert, and back to where I can hear his voice and feel his Deep love for me in very tangible ways. I just want to say Thank You Lord :) Just when I had finally found my identity in You and was finally Satisfied with Being your Beloved, you surprised me !

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ON another note, it was a lovely time to have spent time with the girls this past weekend. Char came back from NYC to celebrate her American Thanksgiving with us at our favourite pig-out spot: Yang's Kitchen hahha. All I gotta say is that we DEFINITELY know how to cause Ruckus by the mere presence of our voices and laughing :)

And also, check out this short film Casey sent me through email sometime last week called "PLATFORM 6" created by a Christian filmaker. His goal is to utilize the film as a tool to reach out to people in China and other countries with would point people to Jesus as their only hope.

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Till next time,
Cheers :) & God Bless !

Coming and Going...COGOS!!

LONG OVERDUE!!!!! but here's the Thanksgiving entry hehe...gobble, gobble...

I really enjoy Thanksgiving...and the concept of giving thanks for blessings in our lives with the people we care about. This past weekend was a reflection of that. It was sooooo hectic, but at the same time, it was an awesome time to see and spend time with people back home in Toronto. There is so much I'm thankful for... health, people in my life...etc...just too many blessings in life that seem to emerge in my thoughts when Thanksgiving comes around (which makes me think, how much I should really praise the Lord for these same things on a daily basis). Granted, I wish I had some turkey...but nonetheless, fish'n'chips/stuffed chicken/peking duck/pumpkin pie will do :) Leaving Toronto for Kingston on Monday afternoon, I was already feeling the "cage" symptoms again...leaving the big city for the small town, leaving civilization for hermitage...I felt bummed but it needed to be done.

Which leads me to think about the coming and goings that we out-of-towners must experience quite frequently. Every single time I leave, whether from Kingston or from Toronto, I feel like I've left a bit of me behind... like I'm leaving a place where a part of me has been established. At the same time though, there's always that tinge of the "unknown"...things that will develop to be a part of me once I get there. One example is of people and relationships. Everytime someone leaves a place, they leave behind a group of people. Whether they are family, close friends, or a significant other, the truth of the matter is they'll be missed...but there's also that glimpse of hope.. that when you arrive in the "other" destination, there will be people you either will meet or already have established relationships with that will eventually become your close "family". Of course, one can't be replaced by the other, but each can contribute and help develop different characteristics and values in a person. Reflecting on myself, I think I'd be a very different person in thought and in spiritual character if I had stayed in Toronto for school. Not to say that staying in Toronto would've made me any less as a person, but the outcome would've definitely been varied! There's no end to how Thankful to God I am regarding my schooling away from home:

1. It's made me realize how much I appreciate individuals back home
It's funny how my relationship with my dad is actually better when I'm away from home. We don't argue as much or treat each other like 10-yr old tattle-tale-ing siblings as much... haha. Keeping in contact and praying for ppl have also been on my agenda of making me realize how much I appreciate people I care for back home:)

2. It's taught me how to care for those that share the same "fate" as me in Kingston
God's continuing to remind me and to refresh me on a daily basis on how to care for people around me that are also away from home. As John Piper mentioned in his recent sermon, "Carry My Love to My Beloved", Paul was demonstrative in the ways to which he showed authentic platonic and brotherly love to other believers spread around the different churches. (Romans 16). Even in his address to them in writing, he finds things about these individuals that endears Paul and intensifies his love for them.

3. It's reminded me of the omnipresence of God
sounds cliche, but it's only the truth...he's always been there for me, and that is what i'm MOST thankful for :) Whether in Toronto or Kingston, the God of gods, King of kings, Lord of lords has always been present.

What a Thanksgiving, thanks for all the fun back home ;)

Mark 12:30~ Love is Tough Work!

Was thinking about the theme for CCF this year... it's taken from the verse in Mark 12:30






"Love the Lord your God with all your Heart and all your Soul and with all your Mind and with all your Strength."

I've heard of this verse so many times before, but it seems rather refreshing this time. I've never really asked why it would be these particular four aspects: Heart, the Soul, the Mind and the Strength. This time, I questioned, Why these four specific words ? Why this Order ?

1. To Love the Lord your God with All your Heart
I was thinking what it meant to Love with the Heart. For both guys and girls, this means to love with every "organ" of existence..the heart being one of them...haha". As a woman, I notice that in general, our gender tends to act and view loving someone pretty differently than guys. For us, there are a LOT of feelings and emotions tied to the heart. Our brains are filled with overthought and overanalyzed situations/words/scenarios/things. In a human relationship, there is always that factor of risk in giving our hearts completely to another person. There's the risk of being vulnerable and the risk of getting hurt. With God, there's also a risk on our part to Love with all our hearts. Yet, the best part about THIS relationship is that our risk is always minimized due to his unfailing Love for us. I don't have to be afraid of being vulnerable to Him, nor do I have to be afraid of getting hurt. What assurance!

2. To Love the Lord your God with All your Soul
I was thinking of what has and doesn't have souls. Plants don't have souls nor do animals; that's what sets humans apart from all other living things. One part of loving the Lord with the Soul is to allow his Holy Spirit to move and touch us. The soul is the battle ground between God and the Devil. It is the decision maker that determines where the final destination of an individual will be. Unlike the fickle heart (which sometimes cannot decide whether we like/dislike or love/hate something)... there is no inbetween nor middle ground for the soul. So, loving the Lord with our Souls means all or nothing..

3. To Love the Lord your God with All your Minds
What can the mind be filled with ? Mannnnyyyyy things....things that can be beneficial or things that can distract. To give ALL of the mind to Love the Lord means taking hold of EVERY thought that passes through the brain. A lot of things can affect what the mind absorbs, what we see through our eyes, what we feel and experience in our hearts, what we touch, hear and even smell. For me, this has GOT to be one of the tough ones...

4. To Love the Lord your God with All your Strength
God saves the best for last...there's hope yet =) Strength can be physical strength or mental strength. Physical strength constitutes being physically healthy and fit. Likwise, mental strength takes just as much discipline. Strength can mean different things to different people. For some, it may mean to perservere in hard times. For others, it may mean to prepare themselves for upcoming hard times. Either way, the good thing is that all God asks is that we try or put our best effort to Love Him =) He's Understanding, isn't He?

So....The passage taught me that to Love Him means that these things should be treated with care:
1. Emotions/Feelings (Heart)
2. The Soul and the Spirit (Soul)
3. Knowledge and Information / Wisdom and Intelligence (Mind)
4. Effort in maintaining Physical and Mental Health (Strength)

Wow! It's definitely gonna be a big challenge...lots of work! But one step at a time =)


Blessings,
-v

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The picture was taken in ottawa last week... we were walking in the market, and I saw this butterfly land on a rack of beady necklaces. It was an "of the moment" type of thing :)

Homecoming....roadtrip ?

The weekend after Homecoming seems to always usher the feelings that our campus is even MORE ghetto than it already is. It's funny to see that there's a random couch sitting outside our house and even better...the funky smell of unknown substances once we step outside our place.(there's a bunch of football players living downstairs..ahha). This year's Homecoming festivities were rather different from the last few. Instead of treading through the craziness which is Aberdeen, (and doing some entertaining ppl watching...haha), a few of us decided to head to Ottawa for a day trip on Saturday. There were a couple of highlights on our spontaneous roadtrip :

1. Budweiser CD songs: the lovely tunes/parodies of "love songs" created by the guys from Buddy and directed to the taboos of relationships with their girlfriends. <--HILARIOUS 2. THE MARKET!!! (mmm...Pastry Shop, i love thee...Beaver Tails, and you said you couldn't finish one, Becs!)
3. Moroccan food for lunch (mmm...eggplant)
4. Whoa Bear...WHOA....
5. taking "action shots" (S CLUB ANYONE?) in front of parliament field...hehe

Thanks girls for some good spontaneous fun!

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This trip and the conversations we had during our car ride made me think of two things that I've learnt in particular this past week while spending time with the Lord

1. Disruptions and Spontaneity in life can be Blessings and oppurtunities to spread Christ's Love and Care (no matter where God "scatters or sends us"). It maybe something small like our roadtrip, or even something bigger like Hurricane Katrina (where families were displaced from their homes in New Orleans)...God can still use me/us, whether during travel or moving to a new surroundings due to unforseen circumstances, if I/we am/are willing to let Him. (Acts 8:4)

2. Fellowship and Development of Godly Friendships are so crucial to spiritual growth. (Matthew 6:21) says that "Where your treasure is, there your heart will be also". One of my treasures is the relationships I have in my life...with God, with family, with friends... God reminded me that if I remember Him in these treasures, he will bless them and make them grow...yay!

more for later! Cause I Ott-ta-Wa(ddle) to class.... haha

-v

Sup Deck Deck (and Chee Nup Nup)

Been a while since my last post. I meant to write this one a couple of days ago, but just didn't get around to it until now. So, the context of my title "Sup Deck Deck" literally expresses the characteristic of water or rain....wet.

In reference to my weekend, let's just say that it was very "prevelant" haha. Was up at 6:45 on Saturday morning of the Long Weekend, heading out to Niagara with the family. The skies were gloomy, and the weather was pretty chilly already. By the time we got to Niagara, it was pretty much pouring. My immediate reaction to this type of weather was that "this is suck!" (as Carrie's mum would say hehe). I really don't like the feeling of clingy wet clothes...especially since our car was packed. On rainy days, I'd rather stay at home, snuggled up or watch the rain outside rather than standing in it ! And then.....there's the thunderstorms... ooooo i like those too. Anyways, as our day continued, I realized that my crummy mood was affected by WEATHER of all things...and it was showing in the way I reacted to people and to the overall events of the day. Then, my mum said something that made my attitude towards the whole situation change.

"We should be thankful to even have Rain...".

As I thought about that more deeply, I not only realized what a bum I was for complaining about the weather, but thoughts about the quality, characteristic and importance of something as simple as rain and water filled my head and changed my attitude to God's providence.

- one drop of rain is harmless, but a big rainstorm can create destruction of great magnitude
- water and rain can have the power to destroy in situations such as hurricanes, tsunamis, but ironically, ALL LIVING THINGS NEED it to live and survive
- our world is more than 50% water
- rushing water as in the Niagara Falls contains enough power to create energy for daily uses
- bodies of water have provided a barrier and boundary of protection for countries in the history of war and establishment of empires
- qualities of water are unequated to any other element or chemical compound: it exists and can be changed into 3 different phases : liquid/solid / gas
- in liquid form, it only boils at 100 degrees C (making it safe for our bodies, when it's in there)
- in lakes/oceans, the lattice formation allows for warmth to be preserved underwater, sustaining the fish and living creatures underneath
- in gas form, it's part of the cyclic process that allows for plants to absorb nutrients and needed goods

and as I was contemplating these things, I was so Amazed...this is just something as basic as WATER and RAIN!! I often take these things for granted, but God uses the most simplistic things to humble me. How about you, reader ? Are there things in life so blatantly present that we often let pass without a second thought?

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On another note, Scrabble is fun!!! and so is making up sentences out of acronyms and random letters... haha.. RCSE (Rude Children Should Evaporate haha/ Roman Centurions Serve Emperor/Rubix Cube Solved Excrutiatingly/Ravens Crave Squishy Eyeballs haha good times... Boardgames are a great investment, especially the classic ones =) Speaking of which, haven't played Monopoly in a while...anyone up for that ? (oh! has anyone heard of Apples to Apples ..another awesome one).

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Photo is courtesy of Sam Javanrouh of Daily Dose of Imagery http://wvs.topleftpixel.com/about.htm <-- check it out if you haven't....great photographer (works with what he has) =) -v

outta gas...not that kind.

This week has been one heck of a social week... I feel physically exhausted having been out every single day of the week so far. It's like I've been saving all my energy from work for this one single week of tiring freedom (isn't it ironic? Don't you think? oh, Alanis, you say it the best). So this is what the week consisted of,

Monday: Wonderland with May, Carrie, Ass and the boys (yay for whack-a-mole and basketball shoot) SUPISE for Robbie =)
Tuesday: CNE with the girls, and Dessert at night with the twin and my cousin and the Queen's convert...haha (mmm Durian...so smelly but so good)...
Wednesday: Day with the Best Friend =) Dessert with the girls (CHAR IS BACK YAY!!!)
Thursday:...... here it comes, LORD OF THE RINGS MARATHON!!! whoaaaaaaa and the EXTENDED VERSION TOO !!!
Friday: Charity Ball...
I'm think I might do the hibernating next week.... sometimes, too much is overload... I'm definitely "running out of gas".

On another note regarding friendship, I find that I compare myself to my friends a lot of times. Maybe it's because of the "chinese" in me that I tend to do so. It's inherent that in my family, I was taught to always do better than the person sitting beside me (whether in school or in the arts). Although I've learnt to accept and to be thankful for who God made me to be (personality, character, and even in terms of my physical attributes), I still struggle with this issue. Sometimes, because of the fact that all my close friends are so talented, successful, and great in personality, in spritual character and did I mention, Good Lookin' haha (Yes, you guys are wonderful!) I find myself believing that I'm not good enough, or I question why I can't be like so and so. I know that this is called ENVY, and I wanna get rid of it. I know the difference between the Lies and the Truth, so which one will I cling onto ? The answer is easy to say, but hard to grasp in the heart when you've been lied to for so long. I want to continue to cling to his Words, his promises and his Love for me shown through so many years of struggles...please Lord, help me overcome.

Psalm 40: ...."Blessed is the man who makes the Lord his trust, who does not look to the proud, to those who turn aside to false gods. Many, O Lord my God, are the wonders you have done. The things you planned for us no one can recount to you; were I to speak and tell of them, they would be too many to declare..."